The Cure for Loneliness

Hosea means "salvation". Hang on to that because it will be important in a sec. Hosea was instructed by God to marry a harlot. Upfront he was told that she'd be a slut and would cheat on him, leave him, and treat him like a fool. So did Hosea waiver in his commitment to God? Did he waiver in his commitment to his bride? Hosea was a Psalm 1 guy too and he did as he was divinely instructed. But what was it going to be like?

Now put yourself into the story and visualize it. You're marrying a prostitute. Today you could get your TV show for doing that, but this is back in the day when you could kill your bride if the sheets weren't stained to prove she was a virgin. The wedding's over and you're alone with her. She's telling you all those private words that only married partners exchange. But does she really mean them? After all, how many times has she said these words to somebody else? Does she really love you or are you just a client who's paying with a commitment instead of cash? Despite your questions, you still love her. You embrace and kiss her, touching and caressing. As your hands caress your new bride, you realize this same territory's been used and abused by many before you and God's told you many more will use her shortly. As you undress and reveal yourself fully to your bride, you have to wonder how you measure up to all that she's seen before you. Is she attracted to you or going through the motions? Do you feel cheaper because you were pure and virgin before her and she's sold out a long time ago? And all this is your honeymoon, the best that you'll have with her.

This is what I've brought to the table with God. He married me and adopted me into His royal family. He did it knowing that my character was totally against everything He stands for and my actions showed it. He married me knowing that on the same day I accepted Him I 'cheated' on Him many, many times. And daily I still do. Even when I try my best, which is rare, I fall so far short of returning to Him an ounce of what I've been given. My actions cheapen Him. They don't honor Him like He deserves, and I make Him look foolish in my attempts to play the faithful spouse while living my own secret life in my so called dark corners of the world. I'm His Gomer.

God told Hosea to marry a harlot to symbolize how Israel, God's chosen people, had forsaken their marriage to God for the lifestyle of a prostitute. God shaped Hosea into a messenger that personally knew the pain He was experiencing by the rejection of His bride. Hosea was obedient and wemarried Gomer. They had three children and we can learn so much from their story.

First, our actions always bear fruit. In the case of sin, they have consequences. The eternal consequence is death. In marriage, infidelity is the death of the relationship. So as creatures of God, infidelity to Him carries the cost of death. Sin had earthly and immediate consequences too that often lead us down a slippery slope of even more sin, that takes us further away from God and into more loneliness.

Hosea and Gomer's first child was a son named Jezreel, after a city in Israel. Jezreel was a wicked place and place where the Israelites had dishonored God and been unfaithful to Him. The fruit of their sins was war and bloodshed at Jezreel. Like a wandering spouse seeking pleasure, the Israelites that that their adultery would bear no fruit other than pleasure really bore fruit that turned out to be bloody and disgraceful.

God cannot act contrary to His holy nature. His nature is without sin and therefore He cannot tolerate unchecked sin. He promised Isreal, through Hosea, that He would avenge the bloodshed at Jezreel. God's nature is also love. As a God of love, He cannot stand idly by and watch us do things that are spritually destructive. Like it or not, we can be assured that God will intervene in our lives because of His great love for us and to protect His great name which we bear. Sometimes this intervention comes in the way of discipline as Israel was about to find out firsthand.

The couple's second child was a daughter named Lo Ruhamah. Now this story is dead on about loneliness. Sweet little Lo Ruhamah's name translates to "No Mercy". Yikes. Do you see a pattern that would make you feel loneliness? The first child is the embodiment of God's judgment and vengence. The second says a whooping is coming - "No Mercy". God was halting His mercy towards His people and transitioning to discipline. Not good for the home team. God was about to take something away from Israel very precious to them in order to get their hearts to turn back to Him. He was going to all them to be destroyed as a nation.

In my life I've tempted God many times by banking on His merciful character and seeing how far I could push the limits. Painfully He'd allow me to eventually crash into the consequences of my actions and have to come face to face with the fact that I turned my back on Him and invited His judgement. Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever rolled the dice to see how far you could stray without getting the heavenly smack down? What does God want to see changed in your life, and if worse came to worse what would He have to take away from you to get you to surrender your will to His?

Now another thing about litte miss "No Mercy" - she was a girl. Long before Hosea was living the dream with Gomer, God promised Abraham that his decendents would be more in number than the sands of the sea and the stars in the skies. But now because of the people's unfaithfulness, they have a daughter. Scripture says in Hos 1:3 that "she bore him a son". But in reference to "No Mercy" it says in 1:6 that "she conceived again and bore a daughter". So it hints that this may not be Hosea's child. Regardless, a daughter means that the fruit of her family will be whatever is drawn into her from the outside, not like a son who is a continuance of his family. In other words, if God were to allow "No Mercy" to be the fate of the whole nation, then the Jewish blood line would stop with her brother. Worse than just stopping, the line would be corrupted by the horrible offspring that comes from their intermarrying and he husband would be force to bear even more consequences for his wife's infidelities.

You see if God's mercy were to stop, we would be unprotected from the reproductive nature of the consequences of our sins. Instead of forgiveness and restoration, we'd be forced to reap what we sowed. It's a horrible cycle that we began with Adam and Eve and we inherited it from our parents. There's no cure from within. Remember sinfulness is a daughter, only able to receive and birth what comes in to her. Our only solution as sinners is to become the bride of Christ, to receive Him, and to bear His fruits. Without Him, we can generate noting of ourselves to save ourselves. (Eph 2:8&9)

Gomer also nursed "No Mercy". The Bible makes a point to point this out. What happens when a mom nurses? She is feeding her daughter some of herself. We have been nursed by sin. David said, "...in sin my mother conceived me...". During nursing, especially with God's mercy removed, the daughter could only receive what her mom was - adulterous, unfaithful, untrustworthy, selfish. "No Mercy"'s life was then a picture of Israel's future without God's mercy and protection - a spinning, escalating cultureof self-indulgence, adultery, adn wothlessness. Our lives are the same apart from Christ, and likewise, the future of Americ rest in this truth as well. Our survival as a nation depends on it.

Something else amazing happens to a woman who is nursing. She is unable to conceive. It's nature's birth control. God had promised Abraham they would grow and prosper as a nation, but now they were frozen in this picture of Gomer and her daughter. They were unable to conceive, to give birth to a way out. Until God's mercy is present in your life, through the acceptance of Christ as lord and savior and the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, you are unable to conceive any other future except "No Mercy".

Wow, well after Gomer weaned "No Mercy" she conceived and bore another son. His name translated "Not My People". This child reflected the condition of God's people and their lack of relationship with Him. God's people had strayed sooooo far and rejected Him deeply. He couldn't call them His people. Their land was filled with idols and their behavior was an abortion of God's plan for them. Was this the end of the line then? DId God scrap his covenant with Abraham? Were the people doomed?

No. God is faithful even when we are not. (Thank God) Unfortunately, the restoration meant discipline from God, which is painful. In fact it began around 725 BC and the dispersion that resulted from God's discipline has still not 2, 732 years later been fully regathered to their nation. Unbearable. What would your reaction be if your preacher next Sunday passed out a list of all your sins and then spoke about all he was going to do to you to eradicate this sin and resotre the relationship?

This kind of discipline sounds no good at all, but its essential to end the loneliness of separation from God and to survive as Christians. For a better explanation take a minute and read Hebrews 5. The Bible says that those who are undisciplined by God are not real children of His but bastards. Sounds hars, but it's true. Whom the Lord loves, He disciplines. I knew a man who used to quote this verse a lot. He'd tell it to his son before he was about to wear him out with a good old fashioned whooping. He'd say "Whom the Lord loves, He disciplines" and then he'd say, "Boy, you're about to get some loving". For the people of Isreal, they were about to get some loving and it utterly rocked their nation apart and has caused grief for generations. But there will come a day when their redemtion is complete and God's promise is completely fulfilled and none of them will trade it for anything.

In Hos 1:10-11 and 2:1 we see that God is good and His mercy endures forever. Psalm 136 tells the story of the Jewish people and all the miracles God performed for them. Every other line says "His mercy endures forever". I choke up every time I read this. In my life, I can write all the things I've done, and immediately afterwards I see where "His mercy endures forever". I'm so grateful for that. I encourage you to take some time and write the major events of your life out, and follow it with "His mercy endures forever". And no matter what part of your story is yet to be unfurled, it will follow with "His mercy endures forever". In Hosea's life, he saw first hand his nation disentegrating. He saw his wife make a whore out of herself. He lived a lonely existence. And yet in his life he heard the voice of God! He heard His plan. Did you catch in Hpos 1:10-11 and 2:1 that all would be restored? Bad Jezreel would be redeemed. The people would be called "My People" and be shown "Mercy". Restoration - what a cure for loneliness.

In Hosea 3:1-5 we see that God tells Hosea to love his wife once more. He's to love her even thoush she's humiliated him, had sex with many other men, bore their children, been sold into slavery. Could you love again after that?

How far can you get from God and still feel like He'll come for you? Man, Satan wants you to believe that you can get away from His love. He'd love for you to feel unworthy and unloveable. God's instructions to Hosea were a picture of what He does to seek us out in our worst conditions. Despite how we've disappointed, how we've sinned, and how we've become captive to our sins.

Hosea bought Gomer back for a huge price. One that took great sacrifice on his part to pay. Can you imagine Hosea standing in the crowd, bidding for his wife in the middle of that crowd, knowing that everyone around him knew that she was a harlot and he was her husband? Can you imagine how Gomer felt as she stood naked and ashamed on the bidding block, then seeing her husband in the crowd bidding to win her back? Can you imagine her shame changing to love and admiration as she sees the face of the one who knows all her sins and bore all the consequences for them raising the bid and digging deep in her pockets, sacrificing everythign to get her back? She saw him determined to make sure that nobody was leaving that day with her but Him. She was meant to be his all along and today was the day that he was sealing that in. Isn't this an awesome picture of how God sacrificed His son to buy us back? His Son put pride aside to redeem us, to make sure that nobody owned our souls but Him. He knew we were meant to be with Him all along and He gave everything to put it back to the way it's supposed to be.

"Father, thank you for loving me so much that you bought me back from the loneliness of my sin and shame; for staying with me knowing that I'll run again; and for planning to take me back before I've taken the first step to run away. Thank you for chosing love for me over your right to destroy me. You amaze me beyond words. "

Alone or Lonely

Six billion people walk our planet and yet more people complain of loneliness than just about any other social ill. How is that and why are Christians as affected by it as everyone else? This week we'll look at what it means to be alone. Is it possible to be alone and not lonely? Let's take a look at Hosea and Gomer. One was alone and not lonely, the other was surrounded by lovers and miserable. Let's see why...

Imagaine being with the love of your life. You've finally found that secure, awesome story book you've been searching for. This is the person you know God wants you to spend the rest of your life with...and that's awesome with you because that's exactly what you were hoping for. You've made plans together. The wedding date is set. Invitations are sent. Gifts are trickling in. Your checking accounts are merged. All aspects of your life are now intertwined. Your existence is the other person. All you do or plan to do in life involves this love of yours. Everything you've ever hoped for is finally happening. The dream is becoming reality...

...till it starts becoming the nightmare. God tells you that this love of yours is to be a slut. Yep, a slut. Cheating on you. She's to humiliate you. She'll have no secrets about it either. Who she sleeps with today is tonight's gossip at the dinner table. Wherever you go, people see you as the slut's husband. Some people mock you for marrying her and putting up with it. Others feel sorry for you like you were too stupid to pick a faithful woman or too poor of a person to make a woman want to stay with just you. You repel people because your situation makes them so unfortable. So in the middle of the most crowded street, you know you're alone.

But are you lonely? After all God told you this was going to happen and if God does something it's always for our good. Would you feel alone knowing God's plan was unfolding? Well the "Alone but not Lonely" guy is Hosea and the "Definitely Not Alone, but Lonely" gal is his wife Gomer. Let's take a look at Hosea chapters 1-3 to see how to beat this battle of loneliness.

I think it all boils down to this: Away from God = Loneliness. Whenever I've felt lonely in my life, it was at times that I'd strayed and wandered, when I wasn't spending time with God and wasn't listening or obeying. And the times that I felt God's presence the closest were times that I was isolated, but I was close to Him and felt a myriad of emotions and none of them had an ounce of loneliness in it. That's it. James 4:8 says "Draw near to God and He will draw near to you." You can't go wrong with that. Hosea 1-3 shows how Hosea was abandoned by his wife but was inside God's plan, and Hosea was victorious while the nation around him turned into ruins. Gomer on the other hand was in the arms of a lover every night, sometimes probably many times a day, yet her life was falling apart. It's all about the relationship with God. So are you alone or lonely?

Manesseh and Ephraim

Ever watch that TV show "The Wonder Years"? It's a show set in the 1960's where young Kevin Arnold lives his teenage life under the narration of an older and of course wiser Kevin Arnold talking about what the experiences meant to him and all he learned from it. From teenage crushes to fights with his brother, the wisdom of life oozed from older Kevin in every cheesy episode. Often I wish I could look at the here and now with through the eyes of the older and hopefully wiser me that's down the road. Right now we're in the wonder years of life where God is actively working, preparing and perfecting us for the eternity to come where we'll look back with wonder on all He's done.

In all areas of life, what we do now clearly sets the stage for what we'll experience later. Scripture bluntly teaches that "What a man sows, that he will also reap". In this our second week of studying how to live the Forward life in our families, we have to examine what we are sewing now that will manifest itself in our families later. Let's do this by examining Joseph to see how his choices bore fruit in his family later.

Goofy analogy time: Marriage is like an airplane. Whatever luggage you carried into the airport is going on the plane with you. Marriages dissolve everyday because one or both in the couple thought that something carried into the airport wouldn't show up on the airplane. Bad habits, character traits, and priorities all hop right into the overhead bins. Wives all over the world hope that today is the day their sports addicted husband finally turns off the TV, looks at his adoring bride and says "Honey, let's talk". Meanwhile, men worldwide wait for their controlling women to suddenly have an epiphany, turn to their husbands and address him with the respect and honor he's been craving since their first date. There's nothing magical about the wedding ceremony that strips away one's habits, traits, and personalities. What you and I decide today gets packed in the suitcase and rears its head again in the lives of our marriage and parenting.

And what do families today struggle with today? They struggle with trustworthiness, temptation, and fidelity. I think nearly all of the problems a couple faces can be categorized into one of those three. Joseph dealt with all three and over came all three of them with flying colors. Let's take a closer look at how he did what he did and how we can apply it to our marriages.

First, Joseph was trustworthy. Genesis 39:2-6 states just how much Joseph was trusted. Potiphar purchased Joseph to be a slave. Now let's take a commercial break. I don't know about you, but if my brothers tried to kill me, some dudes purchased me to sell as a slave, and then I was turned into a slave, I'd be really tempted to start taking matters into my own hands and escape. The minute no one was looking I'd bail. But we know Joseph lived like he knew God had a plan for him. He didn't panic, didn't take charge and didn't try to escape. Now back to our regularly scheduled program.

Instead of doing things the way most of us would handle them, Joseph gave his boss his best. Like Daniel, Joseph was a Psalm 1 kind of guy. In Gen 39:2 we see that God prospered him for being a Psalm 1 guy. Joseph was a tree planted by rivers of water. And like we explained in earlier posts, Joseph reflected that "life existed" where he was, and that was about to be very important to the Egyptians.

So how do we prepare for marriage like Joseph? What do we pack?

The first "suitcase" we need to pack and take to the airport is trustworthiness.

Trustworthiness is a prized commodity these days. Employers pay huge money for employees with a proven track record of loyalty. In today's economy employees jump ship whenever anything doesn't go their way. In marriages people convince themselves that "I deserve better" and bail all the time. Still millions more live a deceitful life in the shadows bad mouthing their employer and cheating on their spouses. People are untrustworthy all the time and they steal from their employer. Being lazy on the job is stealing. Taking office supplies, using company property for personal use, gossiping about other employees, distracting other employees, and just plain goofing off is all robbing your employer of what you were hire to be trustworthy accomplishing. People will smile at their boss while typing a scathing email about them at the same time. Same goes for marriages. Find someone trustworthy and you've found a treasure.

Joseph was trustworthy before he became a slave. His father trusted him. In fact, his brothers tried to kill him when Israel had sent Joseph out to check on his brothers to see if they were where they were supposed to be.

You can't be trustworthy unless you first recognize that someone has authority over you and that you are accountable to someone. Joseph recognized his earthly and heavenly Father's authority over him. He also recognized Potiphar's authority over him. Since Joseph was a slave against his will, he was trustworthy to Potiphar largely because he was accountable to God for his actions. It was for this that God prospered him.

Joseph was so trusted that Potiphar was only aware of the food on his plate. All of his other affairs he relinquished to Joseph. Once again Joseph reflects Christ. We are to cast all of our cares on Him because He cares for us. And thus his first suitcase is packed full of trustworthiness.

How do you pack a suitcase full of trustworthiness? By being trustworthy now. We reap what we sow says the Bible. The Bible says to have friends we must be friendly and a friend loves at all times. So like Joseph we've got to live like we know God has a plan and show ourselves to be trustworthy with even the most trivial of commitments.

The next suitcase Joseph needs to pack is robustness. Dictionary.com defines robust as:
1. strong and healthy; hardy; vigorous: a robust young man; a robust faith; a robust mind.
2. strongly or stoutly built: his robust frame. Right on. You and I need to be strong, healthy, and vigorous and we need to be strongly built to withstand the storms of life. Remember the parable of the two houses? The house that survived was planted on a robust foundation - the rock. If we want our families to survive and thrive we need to be robust.

How was Joseph robust? He proved his strength and hardy faith by continually resisting temptation. We know that his brothers hated him. Perhaps part of the reason is because Joseph was so resilient. Joseph was too busy being faithful to be hanging out with the gang goofing off. And those habits paid off when he was working for Potiphar.

Remember in Psalm 1 that we are not to sit in the seat of the scornful? Often crisis and bring us to our rear ends and suck the fight out of us and convince us to just pop a squat and complain. Crisis can tempt us with a sense of entitlement. Jesus was so tempted when he was in the desert. Satan tried to sucker Jesus into a sense of entitlement where Jesus would have used his Holy appointment for unholy purposes. Crisis can also bring out the scorn in us by making us want to play the role of the victim. The book of Job paints a pretty thorough picture of one acting like he's been picked on by God. Finally crisis can tempt us into living like cowards in fear. Peter repeatedly let fear motivate his actions and not the focus on God's plan for him. Fear drove him to look away from Jesus and sink when walking on the water. Fear drove Peter to deny Christ three times. Fear put the disciple in hiding after the crucifixion.

Amazingly Joseph didn't allow the crisis of his upside down world to make him succumb to temptation. The more powerful Joseph became the great access temptation had to him. Yet when Mrs. Potiphar put the moves on Joseph, he had the strength - the robustness - to run away from her. Joseph was "strongly built". His character was so strong that he had the wisdom to know where to draw the line between being subject to authority and to resist temptation. He worked for the Egyptians yet chose immediately to disobey when Potiphar's wife told Joseph to "Lie with me".

Right away Joseph knew where his loyalties were and was faithful, trustworthy, and robust. To whom was Joseph faithful? First he told the woman about how much he was trusted by her husband, but made it clear to whom he was accountable in Gen 39:9. "How then can I do this great wickedness and sin against God?" Joseph's priorities were straight. The chain of command in his life was clear. And he was robust in obeying and resisting temptation.

It couldn't have been easy. Potiphar was "the man". He was captain of Pharaoh's guard and his officer. He was at the top of the ladder and food chain. He could have the pick of the litter and I'm sure his wife was a smoking hottie. These guys got what they wanted after all. And day after day Joseph carried out his duties and the Bible says that Potiphar's wife longed for Joseph and she tried day after day to get him to sleep with her. But Joseph was resilient to the point of fleeing naked when she grabbed his robe. Though his robe wasn't packed in the suitcase, his second suitcase was full of robustness.

So hasn't Joseph reached his baggage limit yet? He's got one more suitcase to go. The final one we all need is fidelity. Fidelity is faithfulness to the original. In marriage, fidelity is being true to your wife - your original lover. In recording, fidelity is a measure of the degree of accuracy in how well the duplicate matches the original. In patriotism, fidelity is an allegiance to your country. Joseph's final suitcase was stuffed to the brim with fidelity.

In Scripture, for whom are we practicing fidelity? Christ of course. Truth itself is defined as "fidelity to the original". That's so cool because Christ said He is Truth. He's the original and that's consistent throughout Scripture. John 1:1 says "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." Christ, the Word that put on flesh and dwelt among us is the original, the first and last, the alpha and omega. He's worthy of our unwavering loyalty.

Joseph gave his unwavering loyalty. He gave it in his family life with his siblings. He gave it in his slavery. He gave it in the face of temptation and in the loneliness of prison. No matter how bad it got or how far away from God's plan it seemed, Joseph stayed faithful to the original. How faithful was he? Let's take a look.

To recap quickly to keep this all in perspective, Joseph was hated by his brothers, thrown into a well, stripped of his father's gift, sold to be a slave twice, and now he's been imprisoned under false pretenses. He's not in an American prison with cable TV, a law library and a GED program either. He's in an Egyptian dungeon. Not cool.

Yet Joseph took it all so well and remained trustworthy, robust, and full of fidelity. So much so that the captain of the prison guard turned the joint over to Joseph to run. Here's Joseph in this miserable predicament and you've got to wonder how much time he spent thinking back to his childhood and recalling the dream he had. That dream...poor guy. What if he'd never told his brothers and father about it? That whole chain of events wouldn't have been an avalanche around him, spiraling downward and landing him in this Egyptian prison. In prison, all signs around him point that his dream is way off track and just isn't gonna happen.

To add insult to injury, two of the prisoners Joseph was responsible for had dreams that really troubled them. And how did Joseph respond to them and to God? Joseph was....(pause for effect)...faithful to the original! He instantly directed them to God the Author of prophetic dreams. Two significant things happened in Joseph's response upon hearing about the dream problem.

First Joseph directed them to God. With his own dreams not even close to fulfillment, Joseph hadn't lost faith or fidelity. He was totally bold in directing the men to forward their concern about their dreams to God. This means Joseph had no fear about God's faithfulness to fulfill His promise, otherwise he wouldn't have put his reputation on the line with them by telling them to trust God with their dreams. What a faithful guy.

I've had one moment in life like this and I'll never forget it. In an earlier post I talked about being consumed by a problem. It was destroying me physically, mentally, and emotionally. Yet spiritually after hitting rock bottom my strength began to grow. I prayed hours every day just for solace, passing out from exhausting and fatigue from hunger. One such night I fell asleep on the couch and I was awakened to what sounded like something crashing onto the roof of our tiny 900 square foot house. It was one of those noises that take you from a deep sleep to wide awake in an instant. And in that instant I heard the calmest most assuring voice say "Don't worry. It will be over by Sunday." Saturday night this personal hell ended just as God had told me it would.

When a dream or message comes like that to you from your loving Father, it gives you the strength to hold on, to press on, to not let go. Joseph held on through thick and thin. People around him knew he was faithful and that's why they trusted him. That's why the Cup Bearer and Baker trusted him with their dreams too. In crisis people seek guys like Joseph out.

Second Joseph said "tell them to me please". This says to me that Joseph never stopped being close to God. It's one thing to tell someone you'll pray for them. It's a whole new level of boldness to say that you can tell them the meaning of their dreams. Yet without hesitation, Joseph did just that.

Joseph thinks he might have a ticket out of jail now. He got a promise from the Cup Bearer for help in getting out. But once again Joseph's life takes another lick. Joseph spent two more years in prison. Then Joseph was summoned to talk to Pharaoh about his dreams. In all Joseph was asked to give the Lord's interpretation for four dreams. Joseph was faithful to God every time. A man whose own special dream was seemingly further from fulfillment than when he first had it, was consistent through the years. Anger, resentment, and bitterness never crept into his heart. Joseph's final bag was packed.

With his bags packed, Joseph was ready to watch God work. Joseph acted wisely as God's plan unfolded. He acknowledged God as the source of his abilities and Joseph acted in full obedience to God's plan while faithfully carrying out his responsibilities in it. Joseph set the example for nations to follow. His obedience preserved Jew and Gentile alike through the worst famine the world had known to that point. The Egyptian gratitude for Joseph set the stage for the Israelites to flourish in Egypt and grow into a mighty nation. The practice of saving 20% of your food was carried on for generations. Joseph's actions transformed an unrepentant family into a reconciled repentant one. Joseph was a world changer.

And what did Joseph's bags do for him once he got on the airplane of marriage? It's a beautiful thing. Joseph married and started unpacking his luggage. Do you think this is where the terrible childhood haunts his marriage? Is where the abuse he endured from his brothers makes itself known? Not a chance. Joseph's trustworthiness, robustness, and fidelity to God bore fruit. His first son was named Manesseh and his second son was Ephraim and they sum up the story of Joseph perfectly. Joseph was a Psalm 1 guy because his life reflected Christ. And what does Christ bring into your life, no matter how bad it was? Manesseh and Ephraim - "Forget the Past" and "Double Fruitfulness".

Family Feud

Remember that show Family Feud? Richard Dawson used to host it and two families would battle it out, trying to answer questions about what people surveyed answered to questions. It seemed like on every episode, three of the five family members "got it" and gave decent answers to the questions. But there was always one who was waaaaay out there. I mean the question would be "Name something you wet before you use it", and most people will say something like "toothbrush" or "comb". But the clueless one would say something like "bird". Then they'd get to the final round and be asked several questions in 30 seconds and still would answer crazy. "Name a color" and they'd answer "bird". Richard Dawson would always crack up at these crazy responses that people gave under the pressures of being on TV. Well today we're looking at the life of Joseph and how his family handled the feud between Joseph's brothers and their father. More than any institution in America today, the family is broken, even in so called Christian homes and hopefully today's lesson prepares you to deal with the challenges of family life in America today.

The story of Joseph is pretty common. Cool coat, funny dream, jealous brothers, deep hole, skinny cows, and family reunion. But there's so much more to the story. Just like in all of the Old Testament, we can see Christ within the account. Just like Christ, Joseph had a divine destiny, was the most loved of his father, rejected by his own, innocent but punished, his actions completed the plan to save the people from something they could not have saved themselves from. And that's how we are to move Forward in our families - by reflecting Christ in them. Anything short of that is missing the point.

So how do we reflect Christ is our family? First we are to live like we know that God has a plan for us. In Gen 37 Joseph lived as one who knew God had plans for him. Joseph relied only on the love of his father. Shouldn't we do that too? He knew his brothers hated him, but out of respect for his father he lived peaceably with them. Joseph told his brothers about his dream. He wasn't afraid - God had plans for him. He wasn't cocky - it was God's idea after all. He wasn't fakely humble - God had a personal plan for him. Joseph reflect Christ in his family by living as one with a divine destiny, living with purpose and a focus beyond the petty arguments of the here and now.

Joseph's family was chewed up from the floor up. Jacob, Joseph's dad, literally means "deceitful". A fitting name considering how he took advantage of his brother Esau to get his birthright and how he deceived his own father to get the firstborn's blessing. Jacob wanted to marry Rachel but got a dose of his own deceitfulness when Rachel's dad tricked him into marrying Leah. Not only did he have two wives, but they were sisters. He loved Rachel and as for Leah.....ahhh, not so much. Sounds like a Lifetime movie. Jacob had four sons with Leah and so the sister demands kids or death. But she can't conceive and makes the wild decision to give her maid to her husband to sleep with. So then Leah got jealous and gave her maid to Jacob. Then he Now for the sons. So we have four moms, two of whom are sisters. Zowie. That's too many chiefs for me. Do you think there were some jealousy and hyper sensitivities in that family? Then there were the sons. They hated Joseph and set him up to die, lied to their Dad, and Simeon and Levi went on a killing spree.

Why so dysfunctional? Jacob wasn't living like God had a plan for them. God had promised Jacob that He'd honor the promise through him that was made to his father and grandfather. If Jacob had lived the plan, he wouldn't have needed the maidservants as a way to help God's plan get started. After all, Jesus was from the lineage of Judah, the child of Jacob's first wife. But Jacob, like so many of us, felt like he had to act and like Adam, heeded ungodly counsel.

Why is the story of Joseph so powerful? Because I think we can all see elements of our own families in it. And if we want to overcome and move Forward in our family life, including our future families, we need to know how to act like Joseph and persevere in tough times. According to Scripture, there's no indication that Joseph knew of the crises that were about to befall him. Yet when they came, he never asked why God wasn't being faithful, why he'd been forsaken, or how evil man had screwed his life up. He kept on keeping on. Even when many opportunities existed for him to escape, he stayed where he was planted. He was a finisher and it set the stage for him to be the glue that would ultimately save his family and many others.

So it seems to Joseph's brothers and father that Joseph is a done deal and he's dead. Jacob mourned terribly for Joseph. The Bible says he mourned for a long time and swore to go to his grave mourning for him, and the others were unable to comfort him. Some love they had for dear old dad to see him mourning that badly and never confessed to cheer him up. If they had confessed, it could have cost them dearly - their father's love, the attention they were finally getting with Joseph gone, their inheritance, their father's blessing. So they were selfish and pretended to comfort dad all the while concealing the truth. If we want to reflect Christ in our families, we have to acknowledge sin, at the cost of ourselves, and be crucified to ourselves for the sake of others. But this dysfunctional family didn't know how to do that yet. God was still working on them. In fact, take a minute and compare Jacob's grieving to that of David in 2 Samuel 12:14-23.

So without repentance the feud continues. The stage is set for the sins of the father to be visited on the children of the third and fourth generation. We'll look in the next post at how Joseph lives boldly, contrary to his family, and the results he gets for it.